Finding myself.

“We tend to forget that happiness doesn’t come as a result of getting something we don’t have, but rather recognizing and appreciating what we do have.” – Frederick Keonig.

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Frankly, it took twenty years of my life to realize the above. Until that time, I was a usual child with all the dreams coupled with naivety, fears and anxiety. In spite of being brought up in a family that had wonderful parents and a supportive sibling I felt timid and diffident. Being a silent girl, all I wanted to do was to score well in the academics and sleep well in the weekends!

I had no exposure to competition and the real world as I studied in a local school till class ten. When I moved to a different school in class 11, I found a totally contrasting environment which I was not accustomed to and this didn’t help my scores either. But with some wonderful teachers helping me around, I managed to score well in my Board exams and opted to do Chartered Accountancy (CA) and decided do my graduation through correspondence.

My high score in the entrance test for CA put me on a different course. Everyone at home, including me, believed that I am destined to be a great Auditor! And then came the toughest phase of my life. With coaching classes beginning at sunrise, it was tough to be awake and attentive. In spite of my best efforts, I could cross the conundrum called Chartered Accountancy exams only half mark. By that time, my peers moved up which made me even more depressed. My Articleship intern was a short lived one. I could not stay beyond the first week. I started hating home, shouted at my family and cried in the nights. Slowly it dawned  that I had chosen a course on the basis of what I’m likely to get from it than how interested I am in it. Perhaps my belief that Mondays should always be ‘Happy Mondays’ made me to realize that I wasn’t meant to be an Auditor after all!

This realization light entered into my life, purely by chance, when one of my friends, lent her camera briefly. That day, I could recall quite happily now, changed the course of my life. It was a ‘love at first sight’ and I fell in love with photography instantly. Soon I realized that it was the kind of love that gave me a soul, a reason to live, a happiness that can’t be explained and a meaning for my life. I felt a connect that I had never felt before – a connect that rang a bell, a connect that gave my life a purpose and a journey that helped me to find myself.

During this journey, through discovering photography, I also discovered my true self. When you love something with all your heart, you take all efforts to be sincere to the love. Be it a person, a piece of art, a job or a subject. Photography became the tool that gave me courage to think for myself, stand up against the world to prove my dreams and worth, be genuinely happy and most importantly accept people as they are. To accept people as they are, you first have to accept yourself the way you are and embrace the imperfections. In these two years, I won a couple of competitions, got shortlisted in a national level competition in photography and did a few assignments for people who were generous enough to take me as an intern and student photographer.

It now seems that photography was the elixir that I needed in my life. All the confidence I gathered in my photography session was quite evident in my academics as I could easily get through my admission process for my post-graduation in Media Management.

I truly believe that when you are grateful for what you have, you will be blessed with more reasons to be grateful for. A heart that is light and a mind that is peaceful – I am writing this because every girl in the Indian society undergoes all this – a lost career, a broken friendship and a judgmental society – but the good thing is that, you don’t have to care anymore because as much as the society is important, it is equally important to realize that you are important too. You are the ambitions that drive you, the goals that you set, the thoughts that you think and the spark that within you that compels you to make your life a meaningful one. Be unapologetically yourself and authentically you. In the process, you might feel like you are hurting a few people but they’ll understand. My parents were hurt and disappointed but when they saw me being so strong and confident in what I wanted, they started to believe in me and they supported. Start loving yourself and the world will love you.

SMITA JOSHI

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13 thoughts on “Finding myself.

  1. I truly believe that when you are grateful for what you have, you will be blessed with more reasons to be grateful for. A heart that is light and a mind that is peaceful — sema quote thangam

    super da chellam. lovely : both the article and the author too. we are all sure that you will be going places and achieve your goals soon. “gratitude” will definitely takes you there.

    may god bless you with what you need: let it kindle your passion and drive you to achieve success. with heartfelt blessings and wishes
    sundar

    P.S: would like to visit lalit kala bet nov 16-22. (CWC) do not miss the chance for you to meet a super genius 🙂
    not but not the least how come you write an article without a mention of filter coffee, tiffin, ilayarajah, bombay jayashri, and your fav jyo ??

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      1. Ico, quanto à largada, notei na GP2 que quem largou do lado "par" teve muito mais tração e conseguiu saltar à frente, vide Maldonado e Pérez, que de 2º e 4º pularam para 1º e 2º recetstivampnee.É devido à pista ou Pic e Turvey se atrapalharam ?Se a "culpa" foi realmente o lado da pista, Massa pode estar em maus lençóis amanhã, com Webber no lado limpo.

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  2. Oh my!!!! 🙂 I have no words to express what I feel right now… I can see how much you have grown up (mentally) from the last time we met..To be frank, I am still in the process of figuring out what I rely wanna do… your story is building lot of confidence in me! You are setting an example for so many of us here 😀 Its very rare to find women like you in our society who wanna do what they want to do.. I truly appreciate that in you 🙂 I’m proud of you.. 🙂 Keep it going.. All the best for your future endeavors 🙂

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  3. Boehner began speaking and within 1 minute I'd heard enough of the noisy, unthinking taitgnl-poinks that I was ready to tune out. But the webcast stopped before I turned it off! What happened?

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  4. Hola Manuel,Si estas páginas a lo sumo actualizan contenidos con noticias, lo menos que pueden hacer es saber cómo optimizar los contenidos coeaectrmrnte: uso de palabras clave en el título, encabezados y en el texto; uso de los permalink, de las imágenes, de los estilos de edición del contenido; de los enlaces que mandan a otras webs y de los enlaces internos, de las etiquetas, de la descripción Meta del post, etc. Es lo mínimo que deben saber. Saludos.

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  5. Ad české vrcholné soudy:NS, NSS i ÚS mají kvalitní analytická oddělení, která jsou schopna na dotaz soudce dohledat a případně přeložit jakékoliv rozhodnutí ESLP či zpracovat rešerši k danému právnímu problému. Nevidím důvod, proč by podobná oddělení nemohla existovat i na jednotlivých mieSitnrstvech.souhlasím ale s Vámi, že u všech tří vrcholných soudů je pořád co zlepšovat.

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  6. By the way, Holy Quran doesn't promote the idea that it's okay to kill non believers. Islam is a religion that was born in necessasiy and growing at the momemhbt because the 'free wolrd' do not offer a community… You can argue about the concepts in Holy Quran against peace, like anyone can do about the Bible…Love to you all..

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  7. Hur uppfattar ni den situationen där Pazzini och Puyol nickar ihop? Vi fick ju inga vettiga repriser, men det ser ju ut som ett solklart rött kort eftersom Pazzini skulle gått därifrån segrandes ur duellen.Varför fick Puyol inte ens gult och varför visade Barcelona sitt riktiga ansikte när de inte spelade tillbaka bollen?

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